1sunfight’s Weblog

July 12, 2008

Seventy Year Old Woman Gives Birth

Filed under: Daily Observations,politics — Julie P @ 10:15 pm

One of things about debating online is that offers a person anonymity, thus allowing people the opportunity to state strongly held beliefs without fear of consequences. In this environment it has allowed me learn how men really feel about women. It is a reminder that women have not gained much, if any, ground in gaining equality.

In an open debate the subject of a woman aged seventy giving birth to twins, one a male the other a female, in India was introduced. The woman is married and that in this committed relationship the couple made this major life decision together and then executed it. They had IVF in order to produce a male heir to their property, even though they had adult female children who they could have passed the property on to. Both of the latter facts went overlooked and the woman was judged as a selfish person; the man was completely omitted along with the fact that male babies are preferred over female babies, and the transfer of property and wealth was and still is the domain of males. (I am not going to broach the subject of female feticide and infanticide as these practices do not take place in Western culture to my knowledge and the men who decided the woman is selfish are western.) On that note there are several observations that I have held to be true about men’s views of reproduction and the role that men play in it. During the debate I did ask what they thought about the husband’s role in the situation was. The question went unanswered, yet it was answered and here is why.

Society still holds the belief that reproduction is the domain of women; that men only can look in, especially with the advances of birth control, and cannot participate as they cannot carry a fetus to term and at the end of the gestation period bring a baby into the world. It is the one aspect of the human experience men are locked out of, so they remove themselves and hate women for it. In that framework, men also do not see, or choose not to see, that women become the primary nurtures of the child or children, because men, like it or not, still see themselves as the financial providers of their offspring. To illustrate my point, I mentioned the Indian couple going to any length to produce a male heir. It was not only to have a male child to pass property on to, but it was also mentioned that male child was needed to work the farm to provide for the family; i.e. the male’s role is that of the money maker. Regardless of what society a person lives in these roles are the accepted norm. In Western society this norm plays out in the legal arena too with awarding custody of the child or children to the woman, and assigning child support (aka known as financial responsibility to the man.) What men, or the men in the debate, do not recognize is that this view damages them as well. It separates them from their child or children, not only at the time of divorce, but from the time of birth. Men do not get to spend the time they would like to with their child or children, the child or children do not get to form a more intimate relationship with the father because men are too often absent from their child or children’s lives while they leave the home to earn a living. Patriarchy is damaging to men just as much as it to women, but until men recognizes this it remains easy to brand women selfish, selfish in reproductive choices, selfish in financial responsibility, selfish in general, and abdicates men from this fact.

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1 Comment »

  1. […] – bookmarked by 1 members originally found by praeteritus on 2008-12-25 One of things about debating online is that offers a person … https://1sunfight.wordpress.com/2008/07/12/17/ – bookmarked by 5 members originally found by […]

    Pingback by Bookmarks about Males — January 23, 2009 @ 11:45 am


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